The Best Loser You Can Be

Isn't it funny how you make all these plans and stuff about the future and none of them turn out the way you wanted? And then you realize later that those plans that you had made would have totally screwed you up had they come to fruition. Of course, you don't know all this when you are making the plans. Yet, there is this innate urge to make plans and goals and dreams and whatnots. Why? Just so your mind can rest in peace thinking that it just organized the future? Poor mind, trying to control what is so obviously muddled chaos. That's why I hate telling my plans to people because things never really turn out that way. And then ur all like 'gosh darn, there i go again trying to control life, bad, bad me'. Maybe it's just me...but I feel like i'm losing face when I say somthing and it doesn't turn out that way at all. So can I not help but be secretive? Another technique is to totally downplay your life so that you seem like an utter loser. I mean, you would have enough self esteem to know that you're not BUT people don't expect much from you after that. SO...then when you secretly mastermind your own rising-from-the-ashes sorta thing, everybody would be oohing and aahing because it is such a surprise that such a loser would be doing well. And hot dog, that's what you wanted all along, right? The only downfall to this technique is that there is a tendency to actually believe what you yourself say and think that you are an actual loser. This might lead to discouragement and giving up when you think you can't do any better especially after even your own secret master-minded plans fall like last week's souffle. So the key is not to give up. Be persistant. Repeat to yourself " I can kick ass if I really want to" as your personal mantra. Believe that you are clever and devious enough to fool people into thinking that you are a loser when in fact you are not. Know thyself and Be thyself. Breathe Deep and Kick Ass, grasshopper.