All Grown Up

As a desi gal growing up in America and living in India for a while, I saw most of my gal friends go from being under the jurisdiction of their parents to then being "handed over," on a silver platter no less, to their future husband. I'm not against marriage but this simply perpetuates the idea that women are delicate flowers to be protected throughout their lives. Blah to that. Was there ever a sense that maybe a woman, especially when desi parents bend over backwards with a woman's education, that perhaps she has her own mind, her own ideas, her own sense of agency?
Sometimes I feel like I'm a Desi-American anomaly: 26, unmarried, living away from home, and pursuing a major no desi-in-their-right-mind has ever contemplated. However, at the same time, none of this would have been possible if I was not in college. My parents would not let me live on my own had it not been for the fact that I needed to finish my degree. In fact, I chose the university that I did because it was far from home and it would be a nightmare to commute (or so I told my parents). After being away in India for 3 years, I couldn't fathom living under my parents' jurisdiction again. Not that I hated them or anything. In fact, I think I got along with them better.
Now, years later, I think they realize my need for independence. Mom told me that after I get a job I should get an apartment near work. Imagine my shock. Mom tells me that she knows I can survive on my own if need be but, at the same time, she laments that I haven't met the right man to "take care of me." It's got to the point that she's happy with any news of any guy I tell her when I come home. Whereas 5 years ago she would have killed me if I mentioned a non-Malayalee or a non-Christian guy to her, nowadays, she's like "well, we don't know his culture, but I'm not going to say no....it's up to you. We just want you to be with someone who will make you happy and protect you." YEA! She actually said that! She told me this last week! Imagine my double shock. Not only can I now marry WHOEVER THE HELL I WANT but its MY decision. I attribute this whole change in their attitude to the fact that they are just happy if I marry ANYONE, at this age. Not that 26 is ancient but I'm sure my child-bearing years are ticking away.
Interesting, right? Moral of the story (tongue in cheek): Ladies, if you wait long enough, you can marry whoever you want, live wherever you want, and study whatever you want. Umm, I guess it helps if your parents are slightly more toward the liberal side. I guess I was luckier than most. BUT, at the same, you have to be able to put your foot down too. Maybe I'm also lucky that I'm here and not in India. I bet gals in India would have a harder time in establishing a choice.